The One With a Marriage Proposal (among other things...)

The most important update is that I am feeling much better. I eventually ended up going to see a doctor who prescribed me antibiotics and they are definitely making a huge difference. My appointment was very strange. He literally saw me for three minutes and I left with 6 prescriptions- one for each of my symptoms and an antibiotic. Most of them were equivalents of the thousands of over the counter pills that I have stockpiled in my room, so I decided to just stick with the antibiotic. Anyways, everyone will be happy to know that I am out of bed and back to enjoying India. I am not quite back to enjoying Indian food, but I am sure my body is happy that I am taking a break from potatoes and sticking to the BRAT diet.

On Tuesday we were able to complete our interviews with the sixth and seventh graders. It was so wonderful to hear about their lives, and I am so grateful to Sanghamitra for translating for so many hours. Since Dolly-ji already wrote up information about their families we just wanted to talk to them more about their everyday life and aspirations for the future
Here are the questions we asked them. Most of them we would follow up with why questions etc.

1. When did you come to Little Stars? And if it was late we would ask them about their previous school and how it compared.
2. What is your favorite subject?
3. What do you want to do after Little Stars?
4. What do you do after school?
5. Do you think it is important that children go to school, and why?
6. If you had one wish for anything, what would it be?

Annie also took incredible pictures of the children and I am excited to finally put all of this together when I get home. Today I was able to teach my class and we reviewed the present tense. The kids are definitely improving at forming sentences and I have noticed that they know a lot more verbs and adjectives than they did a month ago.

I decided to venture to Godalia (the huge market) on my own after Little Stars today. I had the intention of buying some gifts (which I did do) but it ended up turning into a huge shopping trip. I rode over with a really nice man from Kentucky who is here doing a Buddhist retreat. I really enjoyed the opportunity to give him advice about the best restaurants and peaceful places in the city to journal.  It is moments like those that I realize how amazing it is that I have found a rhythm in this chaotic city halfway across the world.

I bargained for about 10 minutes to get home for 50R. My rickshaw driver was so funny and kept asking me all of these hilarious questions about my life. When a very young driver passed us and I pointed out how fast he was going, my rickshaw driver decided to race him. We were flying down the street, swerving to avoid potholls and various animals along the way. He turned around when we got stuck in some traffic and asked "are you married?" I laughed and answered "no I am too young" in Hindi, which made him laugh. He goes "you marry me? We be nice couple, foreigner and Indian. Everyone look at me and say lucky man because you so beautiful". I politely refused the proposal, but he will be meeting me tomorrow morning to take me to work so I suppose if I reconsider I could bring it up with him and see if the offer still stands. 

With only 16 days left in India I find myself with very mixed feelings about my return to the US. I am currently sick in bed and quite honestly homesick.  There is nothing I would rather have than access to endless Hulu TV shows, chicken soup, and a fully stocked medical cabinet. I've had to make some replacements (Bollywood movies, kicheree, and a prayer that my pepto bismol doesn't run out) and I am sure I will be just fine tomorrow. 

With that being said, overall I've had a really good week. I finally finished my ring in my jewelry class and we are starting pendants/earrings! I finally feel comfortable teaching my 7th graders at Little Stars and I am proud of how hard they have been working.  The new project to help get the kids sponsors for next school year is finally underway. One of the administrators at the school, Dolly-ji, has been extremely helpful in translating the children's stories into English for me so that we can give potential sponsors a more personal look at their lives. Next week we are planning to interview the kids in Hindi about their lives and aspirations for the future. The little that I've learned about has already been very eye opening. Most of the families make between $24- $32 per month. That means that these children are essentially living on much less than $1 a day considering most of these families have 2-4 kids. It's easy to forget that the kids at Little Stars are growing up in such adverse conditions because I only see them in class with clean uniforms and smiling faces. 

This week I have also been focusing on my Hindi, with lessons every day with my host father, Pinku-ji. I am really enjoying it, mostly because it is so useful while I am here.  It is hard to believe that I only have a little over one more week left in Varanasi. There are so many things I still want to do, and I can't really imagine this adventure ending so soon. If there are any last minute gift/ postcard requests please email me!   I hope all is well with everyone back in the States!

Much love,

Jenna

The One with a Cow Attack and a Beautiful Morning Walk

Cooking upstairs

For those of you I have not told- two days ago I got attacked by a cow. Vedika requested banana pancakes so I ran out with Natalie (the other homestay student) to get some honey. On the walk back I apparently looked at this one cow for a bit too long, and it started running at me with it's head bowed down. Thankfully I saw it coming so I was able to put my arm across my body. I am completely fine but it was a bit scary... The good news is that the banana pancakes were a success! Vedika was so excited that she woke up three times the night before dreaming of them. After my homestay family was able to come on skype to meet me family at home which was nice.

My first day back at Little Stars was wonderful. The kids were so excited that I was back and seemed very engaged in the lesson. I decided to print off notes for them to fill in as they listen to the lecture and I think it helps them to stay focused as I go through the material. We also had time for a game where I would say the Hindi adjective and they would compete to see who knew the English equivalent. It was good for all of us because I got better at my Hindi and they had fun while learning English. 

This morning I woke up at 5:30am to go with my host grandmother on her daily 6am walk to the Ganga-ji. Since neither of us can really understand each other we didn't talk much, but the walk was peaceful and nice. She brought seeds with her and was adorably feeding the birds as we walked. We sat by the river on a bench for a while and looked at the dark grey sky. She was explaining to me that it was  usually much more beautiful as the sun rises, but today's weather is "no good" because there is no sunlight. On the way back we stopped at two temples so that she could do her morning puja. It was nice to just enjoy her presence and to still have a good walk without having to talk much. I also love seeing India before everything has started up, because it is so much  more peaceful and manageable. 

 Just some fun pictures of the family:

Nityaji, Pink-ji, and Vedika's uncle

Vedika dressed up in a "saari"

Omesh playing with the water guns from Holi

The One With Lots of Colors! (And some water gun wars...)

"Before Picture"

The second day I was in my homestay Vedika said to me, "so you're here for 6 weeks, does that mean you will be here for Holi?!".  I told her yes and she responded with an adorable dance of happiness around the kitchen. As she has told me a few  million times since, "Holi is the best holiday", and "we will play with colors on the roof and dance", both which are usually accompanied by an imaginary demonstration of her shooting a water gun at me. Anyways the countdown for Holi began right after I got back from my retreat. Lillian, Annie, and Nikki ended up coming over (at 6am to avoid the scary people on the street) and we all played together on the roof. Since I am the only American with Hindi music my ipod was attached to the set of speakers and we blasted a mix of Bollywood and American top-40s music (thank you Nikita and Esther for that...). Thankfully I bought some extra colors (which are sold every 10 feet along the street in the week prior to Holi) and two huge water guns. The colors look like colored flour and you mix them with water in buckets and then it's full out war from there. We all had so much fun squirting each other and the neighbors on adjacent roofs. After our colors ran out we filled the buckets with water and would plan surprise attacks with Vedika on unsuspecting dancers. There was also a large precession of men down the street who were covered in colors and some were riding colored horses and water buffalo.

After we played for a while we showered and had a delicious lunch. The best part about having the cooking teacher as your host mother is that you definitely get the best food. After lunch we just rested and then got ready for the evening. I was excited at the opportunity to wear my new "fancy" outfit for going around to different houses with the family and hosting guests at ours. The only common denominator between different foods for Holi is that they are all fried. Nithya-ji spent a few days making potato chips on our roof and cooking fried pastries for those who would stop by our house. When you go to visit, the tradition is that you put some color on the host and hostess' foreheads (and sometimes cheeks etc) and then they put theirs on your forehead. I enjoyed being 'part of the family' and having the opportunity to see how they celebrate Holi.

"After"

Overall I am really happy and excited to make the most of my last three weeks in India. Yesterday we visited a Fort and museum and today we watched a Bollywood movie in theaters (Kahaani for those who are interested).  I've been getting a lot closer to my homestay family and appreciating that I have shifted roles from a guest to more of a family member. I am now allowed to clear my own plate and clean off the table etc.  I have also been really enjoying my Hindi lessons and have been getting lots of practice at home. The grandmother loves when I try to talk with her and she always is trying to teach me new words. Also for those who have read this far- if anyone wants a postcard please email me your address and I will send one before I come home!

Dressed up for the evening

The One With Our Group Project

For our group project we were asked to journal each day about our experiences.  I figured I would just post my journal entries for the blog. I apologize for how long this is (feel free to just skim it)! Overall I had a really good experience at Mother Teresa, and I am glad that we were able to engage in work very different from what I do at Little Stars for our group project.

March 5

Today was our first day working at the Mother Teresa center for the elderly and mentally ill.  Since the celebration of Holi is essentially taking over the entire week, it was decided to move our group volunteer project to the beginning of this week. The center was clean and happy and it was really interesting to see something of Christian influence in India.  We spent the morning working with the women in a sort of game/ arts and crafts room. I was able to put my French to use in order to talk to the super sweet French volunteers who have been there for about two months. I spent the first hour helping this really nice elderly woman bead necklaces with large wooden beads in order to work on her hand eye coordination.

At first I was a bit hesitant on what I should do with the women and how I should act toward them.  Though I spent a semester working in a Special Needs classroom in middle school, there is something very different about working with people who are older than you.  It is hard to find the balance between showing them the respect they deserve and interacting with them on a level that feels comfortable to them.  Though they spoke very little, I felt bad that the language barrier was keeping me from understanding what they were saying to me and from telling them things.  I just kept throwing around two of my favorite Hindi words “sundar”, which means beautiful, and “accha” which means good.  After a while the women went for a tea break, and when they returned Annie and I played carrom with one of the men who are staying there. The game is essentially like a mini version of pool, but you flick a striker tile to hit the other ones into the four holes at the corner of the board. The man we were playing with was so adorable and would always pass the striker to us when it was our turns. He then would line it up and point to the tile that would be easiest to put in. He was mostly super serious about the game but every once in a while when Annie or I would fail miserably he would crack a smile, and then show us up by perfectly placing his in. We lost all three games but I really feel like he enjoyed the time we spent together. 

Our leader Julie told us that Mother Teresa’s philosophy was to do small things with great love, and I am really trying to make that my goal for this week. In the past it’s been really important for me to really see that I am making a difference with my volunteer work. I have been working on this trip to find a balance between what is being asked of me, and what I think will make the most difference as I volunteer. As someone who is very goal focused, it is often hard for me to feel like I am doing anything at all if I don’t see tangible results of my work. I’ve found though that often this mentality just does not work in India, where everything takes longer and is more complicated than it should be. The lesson I’ve learned is that it is much more about your presence here, than what you get done. As I’ve working with populations who often do not get much attention in this community, I realized how much it means to people for us to just take time to interact and listen to them. I feel really good just knowing that I made that man smile and have a good morning and I am looking forward to going back tomorrow. 

March 6

Today I had a really wonderful experience at Mother Teresa. We got there a little earlier (7:30am!) in order to help out with the laundry and floor scrubbing. As we were getting ready to help out with the laundry one of the nuns pulled Nikki and I aside to come upstairs and help out with the food preparation. I spent the first hour there peeling potatoes with the man who I played carram with yesterday. It was great to work along side both volunteers and patients of Mother Teresa. I loved that they allow the patients to help out with the different tasks they are able to do because I think it is really rewarding for them to feel as though they are contributing to the community at Mother Teresa. Though no one was talking, there was just a feeling of all around appreciation as everyone worked together to get the food ready for lunch. 

            After we finished with the vegetables we were sent into the kitchen to help out with the chapatti making. For those who are not aware chapattis are the Indian equivalent of tortillas, and a chapatti-variation is served with essentially every meal. I am glad that we had some background from our cooking class a few weeks prior, because the art of chapatti making is much more complicated than it seems. It is interesting how much more labor intensive Indian cooking is in comparison to everyday American cooking. Between the constant peeling and cutting of vegetables and the kneeding and rolling out of the chapatti dough, you know there is a lot of love and care that goes into each Indian meal. 

            Once we finished rolling out chapattis we headed down to the arts and crafts room to play with some of the patients. I was sitting with two quiet women who were beading necklaces. They did not seem to want to interact much but they would often look up to make sure I was still sitting there to show me their necklaces. It was nice to have a balance of tangible work and time to just spend with the patients at Mother Teresa.

            Today I also realized how much I appreciate the overall atmosphere and environment at the home. When you walk in you can just feel the care and happiness that makes the home run. The nuns and volunteers have been very welcoming to us and I often just enjoy watching them interact with the patients. It is clear that the patients are very loved and taken care of. It is incredible how the people who work there know the patients on such a personal level. They really take the time to know things like who needs to work on their hand eye coordination and who you can’t rush to lunch because they will be upset if they don’t finish their picture. During my time working at Little Stars I often found myself wishing that the staff knew more about the kids abilities than what their test scores were. The environment at Mother Teresa feels much more Western than Little Stars, and I wonder if this idea of individual attention is just representative of the different cultures. Anyways, I am excited for our last day at Mother Teresa and appreciative that I am getting exposure to a very new type of volunteer work

The One with THE Bodhi Tree, a 64 Foot Buddha, and an Awkward School Ceremony

The Bodhi Tree.

Thankfully we were able to make time for a day and a half of sightseeing in Bodh Gaya. Unfortunately Julie was feeling ill, so we were left in the hands of a tour guide named Dhirendra for a day. Dhirendra is the most rushed and stressed Indian man I have ever met. He talks a mile a minute and had plans for us every 5 minutes. We essentially jogged to the Bodhi tree with no time for taking pictures as we had to meet the head of the "Buddhist Association" for a blessing. I am still not sure what the Buddhist Association is (and my google search has not helped much) but the man was kind and gave us a blessing under the tree. We were then given 20 minutes of "free-time" to explore and take pictures. I sat for a while under the tree and just watched the monks and religious groups doing their different rituals. It is incredible how different the energy was in Bodh Gaya compared to Varanasi. After I took a few pictures we were dragged past a line of people waiting to see a state of the Buddha by Dhirendra so that he could take a group picture. I have been very conscious while in India of the cultural differences, so that I offend as few people as possible. I feel that Americans often have a bad reputation for not being respectful of the cultures that they step into and I have been putting in a lot of effort to offset that reputation. Anyways, for the first time in India I felt utterly disrespectful, as I was forced to cut a line of people and then turn my back to the Buddha statue for a series of pictures with a not-very-happy monk.

After this we got into cars and headed into the country. I got my first real look at 'village life' as we drove on a small dirt path out to a school. When we arrived at the school I immediately realized I had no idea what we were there for. There were two lines of about a hundred school children awaiting us. I was lead to a small girl who placed a necklace of beautiful orange flowers over my next and then walked down the path to the school as children threw flowers at me. We were then seated behind the children at a table lined with a white table cloth, and all I could think was that we must have been mistaken for some important donors or volunteers. We then were part of a large assembly/ performance where the children danced and we broke open large vases filled with paint to symbolize the commencement of Holi. Dhirendra was telling us that we were being treated essentially as royalty because we were such important guests essentially because we were white. I struggled to appreciate the experience overall because I hated being treated so special when I have done nothing for the schoolchildren or the village communities. It was a little reassuring to know that we helped make the celebration special for the children, but overall it just felt very wrong to me.

The HUGE buddha statue

After the retreat we were able to get in a morning of sightseeing. During the retreat we could see a huge Buddha statue from across the town so we decided to go there first and stop in on temples on the way. It was really interesting to compare the different wall paintings/ architectural styles of the temples. Each country has a different mosque built sometime in the past 1500 years. Overall I really enjoyed my time in Bodh Gaya and the opportunity to see a city which is so heavily imbued with Buddhist culture. 

Us playing bananagrams at the train station encircled by
at least 30 Indian men

Baby pigs (for you Kelly)

The One With A Lot of Reflection

Things I did know about the retreat:

1. We were going to spend 5 days in silence
2. We weren't allowed any media, or books that weren't based on personal growth
3. The week was supposed to be focused on reflection and meditation
4. The retreat was in Bodh Gaya, the site of Buddha's enlightenment

Somehow I missed the memo that I was going on a Buddhist retreat . . . As all chronic over-thinkers and over-planners do, I had a plan for the week, a vision for what I would do with my 5 days of silence.  The retreat ended up being completely different from what I had imagined, but in only the best way. The Root Institute is absolutely gorgeous. There are flowers and greenery everywhere, intermixed with small ponds, stupas, and Buddha statues. I immediately realized how much I needed a break from Varanasi's chaos and I looked forward to a week of relaxation. The first and last days were spent sightseeing (I'll write about those in a separate post), and Monday- Friday we had a very specific schedule and were not allowed to leave the Institute's grounds. 

Schedule: 

6:45 am Mediation

7:30 am Breakfast (Nap. . .)

10:30 am Buddhism Lecture

12:00 pm Lunch (Nap. . .)

2:00 pm Buddhist Movie (Nap. . .)

4:30 pm Meditative Movement

6:00 pm Dinner

7:00 pm Journalling Circle/ Inner Work

The Meditation hall.

We would get up at around 6:30 am to roll over to meditation. There we had a series of two 20 minute meditation sessions, the first where we were instructed just to follow our breath, and the second where we were told to follow our breath and then identify other sensations as sound, pain, smell, thought etc. I quickly was reminded at how much I think and how uncomfortable sitting cross-legged is. After meditation we would head to breakfast and then for our daily morning nap. Our Buddhism lecture was by a really nice Israeli monk. As the week went on I appreciated the lectures more and more. I really enjoyed how thoughtfully he would answer anything we asked and how respectful he was of other belief systems. Buddhism is heavily focused on compassion for all living beings, and I got a lot out of the different lectures and discussions we had on the topic.  As the week progressed my view of what compassion entailed widened and I reflected a lot on how I can incorporate selflessness and love into my relationships.  

Inside of the meditation hall.

After our lecture we would head to lunch, which was consistently the best meal of the day. We were told that the food was going to be healthy and delicious, but apparently the last commentator either had a strange palate or the cooks changed since the last group that came through. Though I came to have a newfound appreciation for tofu, I often found myself smuggling PB & J's out from breakfast (Camp Newman style) for snack and dinner. After lunch I would often read in bed and then have another small nap before our movies on Buddhism at 2pm. We watched a 13 video series on an introduction to Buddhism. The movies were fine, a bit preachy for my taste, but the material was definitely interesting. One monk who would watch with us would fold his hands into prayer every time the Dalai Lama would come onto the screen. Since I was in charge of the remote and DVD player, I would always fast forward through the little introduction. It was super funny to watch his hands fly up and down as the Dalai Lama would quickly fade on and off the screen. 

Sunset on the roof

After the videos we had more relaxation time and then meditative movement. Some of my group members created full work out routines for the week, but I ended up making the railing on the roof into a makeshift ballet barre and practicing my corpse yoga posture in the sun (also known as tanning in the west). I spent a lot of the retreat reading a book on the intersection between Psychology and Buddhism, journalling, and mastering a new Sudoku-like game (if anyone is wondering I can do the Challenge level in under 8 minutes). 

Dance. Party.

What I appreciated most about the week was that I finally had time to sit and think. My life had become so crazy and busy in Varanasi that I rarely had time to reflect on what I was experiencing, and how I could truly give back to the community here. Though I didn't fully enjoy my time in Bodh Gaya, I definitely got a lot out of the week. I am really excited for our group volunteer experience this week, and to start again at Little Stars next week.